silveryscrape (silveryscrape) wrote,
silveryscrape
silveryscrape

Lazy, omg. No food in my house, and no water. Suitcase STILL sitting in the hall, but it is unzipped, at least. Clothing strewn about, and dishes in the sink, and I've got to take a shower one of these weeks, I guess. I will. But not, you know, right now.

I'm determined to start the swap story today. If by determined you mean "thinking about JC and Justin fucking." Ahahahaha!! Sorry. I'm in a dark pit, writing-wise, lately. See! *mourns* Writing-wise.

It was a lot more fun when I wasn't trying so hard not to suck. Dude! Thass fucked up. But yes, my internal censor stomps each word before I even have time to type it.



me: "jc said"

internal censor: OMG YOU CAN'T START EVERY SENTENCE WITH A CHARACTER NAME

me: jc said "when jc said"

ic: ...

me: [nervously] "when jc said 'hi' to justin that night"

ic: WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?? SHOW, DON'T TELL. JC SHOULD JUST SAY HI AND BE DONE WITH IT. JESUS CHRIST IN A BASKETBALL HOOP, DID YOU JUST HATCH YESTERDAY?? REMEMBER THAT DEGREE IN ENGLISH? FUCK.

me: [hands trembling visibly] "when jc said 'hi' to justin that night" "'hi,' jc said, and justin said..., um. justin said. justin. um.

ic: AIIEEEERRGH!!!!!! !!! ! BAD BAD BAD!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING??

me: okay, time for lunch!

ic: [grumbles, and subsides]

me: whew





The only solution to this problem, of course, is to write, and let it be bad, and keep writing, and let it REALLY suck, and keep writing, and OMG FUCK FUCK FUCK, and keep writing. I know that, but jeez, sometimes I don't want a breakthrough, you know? I just want to write.


Okay, time for lunch! Hahaha. Ha.



Also, you know what the cutest thing in the world is? When Justin listens to Chris talk, and he gets so focused and intent, like watches his face so seriously with his mouth open a little, but when Chris says something funny he just lights up and throws back his head in gleeful laughter. I love that so much. *sighs*
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