silveryscrape (silveryscrape) wrote,

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This post brought to you by the letter "I"

An excellent day. My back let go of me a bit for the first time in weeks, so I was able to repot my palm tree and back up my computer and clean a little and just hang out, mostly pain free, for hours and hours.

Amazing how pain takes you over.

I can say with certainty that I'm in the best place I've ever been in my life, emotionally and mentally. Took me awhile! What's up, then, with the fact that physically I keep feeling like something's sucking the life out of me? Okay, dramatic. Really what it is is a feeling of imbalance, like something's going up when it should go down, or maybe too much is going, or not enough, or not going at all... I don't even know what I'm saying. It's getting to the point where I'm kind of laughingly picturing myself inside a silver sphere, you know, feeling like a tool but telling whoever or whatever to leave me be, because this is me and this is my space and how much fun is it for you to cling to me, anyway, when all it does is make me feel shitty? Sigh.

I haven't been into the wicca stuff and the energy stuff and the psychic protection stuff for years and years, except for yoga. I haven't needed to! Plus, a person gets tired of getting the sideways glances, like wackadoo! We got us a live one! all the time. Because I'm not a person for secrets. I mean to say, I have a big mouth. I like to talk about my interests.

Eh. It's probably more the breathing I did, and posting the story finally, and trying Aleve instead of aspirin or Motrin, and I swear to god, getting that poor damn palm tree out of prison and into a roomy new home. Right?

Life certainly is more interesting the other way, though.

Under the heading of "apropos of nothing": What do you notice first on entering a room? I always hear whatever music's playing. Then, altogether, color and light and people.

Oh! I just realized, this is the type of spacey buzzy writing I do when my subconscious is figuring something out. Hmmm. Wonder what. So... nevermind. Carry on!
Tags: meee

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